I like burritos a lot more than I like Jesus.– Hannibal Buress (via jennicababylonia)
Today it’s a woman’s world, and this man’s man is on a mission to get men back...– The opening line of the description for ABC’s new piece of shit they’re calling a sitcom, starring Tim Allen. I cannot even describe my face to you right now. (via sade) I’d watch it. HOR HOR HOR (via todayistheday) Did Gervais exec produce???
Whats up, Spidereggs?
I wouldn’t like to eat skin in a soup– Julia Child
Meet me at the Crisco Disco
Beats By Diplo
Nips by Niplo.
That I was conducting a study were the experimental group was called “the secret AIDS group”. How did we even get that past the IRB?
You’re the gay one in this relationship.
Teens Sue MTV Over Defecation Incident?
“The teen-agers said they were standing next to a stage on Jan. 21 at the Snow Summit Ski Resort in California’s San Bernardino mountains, watching a two-man act called Shower Rangers during videotaping of a “Snowed In” segment of the MTV show. “Without warning or explanation the two Shower Rangers turned their backsides to the audience, both opened a flap on the...
When meeting new people, instead of telling them your name when you shake hands, try guessing theirs.
I am f’reeeeaaaaaaaalll .
Where The Mild Things Go.